I walked into our computer room to find Leo playing a game and eating a cup of Italian Ice. It was 7:00am. And I’m not old.
Me: “What’s that? Ice cream?”
Leo: “No- it’s Italian Ice.”
Me: “Where’d it come from?”
Leo: “From Grammy’s house. I hid it in the freezer a couple of weeks ago and in the middle of the night I remembered I had it.”
Me: “Why are you eating it right now? Have you even eaten breakfast?”
Leo: “No- I haven’t had breakfast. It’s okay, though.”
Me: “Is it? Since when is it okay to eat ice cream at 7:00 in the morning?”
Leo: “It’s not ice cream. It’s Italian Ice. That makes it fancy.”
Me: “Yeah? Well it’s still full of sugar so that makes it dessert.”
Leo: “It’s only a dessert if you eat it AFTER your dinner. I’m eating it BEFORE breakfast so it’s nothing. You want some?”
Me: “What? I don’t even know what you just said…”
Leo: “You want some?”
Me: “No, thank you. Put that away and eat something healthy, please.”
Leo: “It’s ’cause you’re old.”
Me: “What is?”
Leo: “That you don’t want me to eat this. Old people don’t like to eat fun stuff.”
Me: “I love to eat fun stuff- I just eat healthy foods first. And I’m not old.”
Leo: “Try this, though…it’s fancy.”
Me: “No, thanks…I don’t eat blue stuff.”
Leo: “See? Old.”
And to prove to him that I’m not old, dammit, I ate a German Chocolate cake for breakfast. It being German makes it fancy and no longer just cake.
In his face. Thanks, Germany!